> ... part of your brain is going to know you're playing sour grapes and that seems likely to undermine the effort.
It totally doesn't. I've been there. Even though you conciously know that negativity toward your ex is somewhat fake it still helps you fix your brain.
Romantic love is nothing else than addction to a person. You don't expect as a recovering addict to stay "on speaking terms" with cocaine nor remembering it fondly will help you to recover better because that's the honest way and keeps your integrity.
You should remember as much bad as possible and see bad in things you thought were good. Also you should talk about your tragic falling out, with anonymous strangers, eventually you'll get bored with your own story and move on.
It totally doesn't. I've been there. Even though you conciously know that negativity toward your ex is somewhat fake it still helps you fix your brain.
Romantic love is nothing else than addction to a person. You don't expect as a recovering addict to stay "on speaking terms" with cocaine nor remembering it fondly will help you to recover better because that's the honest way and keeps your integrity.
You should remember as much bad as possible and see bad in things you thought were good. Also you should talk about your tragic falling out, with anonymous strangers, eventually you'll get bored with your own story and move on.