Unfortunately, and I count myself in this, a lot of people are unwilling to take that deep look inside to be able to answer that question.
As with so many things, any defects must be measured from a wider scope within which comparisons can be made. Corrections can also be incredibly difficult or just costly, if a positive direction can even be identified.
This is possible, but I've found many/most adults are observant enough to comprehend their incompatibility with local culture. However, a smaller percentage of them attempt to do anything about it (e.g. too apathetic, depression, etc.).
>By definition (and I share the original post's issues above), a subject in this state is already far enough out of calibration that they cannot self-diagnose issues, let alone work towards correcting them.
I disagree. I would split these people into two groups: Those who have self awareness and those who do not. And then, those in the self awareness group would be split between those who are ready to attempt change, and those who are not. This is harsh, and I hope I'm wrong: I think the non-self-aware are incapable of being helped or changing. I think that's the group you are referring to.
[Note: this assumes we are talking about the subject of the OP/article. More so than less psychologically healthy lonely adults]
It's however true though that men and women operate in very different social contexts and that can be hard to navigate. A lot of forming a relationship with anyone is becoming mutually comfortable enough to escape such contexts.
To give an anecdote ... me and my wife are about literally the most opposite of people. She likes almost nothing that I like, and in many ways, vice-versa (opposites attract, as they say). I've gone to my share of nights out clubbing with her (which I mostly dislike, other than being with her), and she's endured way too many a geeky discussion. Eventually we settled into a groove and found mutually interesting interests :)
Often enough, it simply boils down to being unattractive. People automatically like you if you're attractive. People do not automatically like you if you're unattractive, you have to work for it.