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While I’m not sure if it’s possible to turn of fb ‘last seen’ the attitude of friends using that or similar info (ie read receipts in iMessage) to jump to conclusions was precisely what I had to “train” my friends on. Personally the big reason for me is that I like to be in control of engaging in a conversation depending on what I’m doing, how I’m feeling, how much thought I have to put into it, etc. At first I made a lot of excuses (I was riding my bike and saw your message pop up but couldn’t respond, sorry!) but eventuallly just explained that my level of social media/communication engagement was just fundamentally different.

Of course I completely except that this means sometimes I miss out on something or that I can’t be the one to re-negotiate plans last minute, but overall it’s a good trade off. My close friends also know to just add a “need answer today” or “..now”. And also that I will still respond to messages that are truly of a critical time sensitive nature “car broke down! Can you pick me up?”

I do really wish most connunications apps cane with more status options (unavailable, busy, do not disturb, response may be delayed, etc) or customizable auto responses.

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