Keybase feels like the chat program HN never had.
Why is it good for mental health? Well, it's easy to get isolated. Sometimes the data you're receiving paints a very different picture to you than it does to someone else.
It's probably an unpopular view that mental health is improved by adding more internet, not less.
I'd tend to agree, if only there were non-internet activities to go to. Church is out. No school. I'm sure there are hackerspaces somewhere near by, but those have to be planned. I can't just go there at 2am, which is what I feel like right now.
People who say it's good to disconnect are kind of like wealthy people telling the poor to just have money. Yeah, it would be nice, but programming and conversations are two fulfilling activities.
Especially from people I don't know. Hi! Talk to me, if you want. If you need anyone to listen or to let you unload on them, use me as an outlet. I won't mind. And I don't care if it's random bullshit or things that seem like bullshit. I won't judge you, only listen to you and talk it over. And I'll keep your secrets.
I used to do that on Kuro5hin, but it went down, I used to do that on Reddit but got banned from some subreddits with no feedback given.
I have websites I am working on to develop into organization etc.
I can be reached by email@example.com
I have a keybase but haven't used it much. I don't have many friends, many reject me for my mental illness, and I am not allowed to talk about it in public areas of the Internet.
For some reason, I get along with people who have autism because I have social issues like they do, and might be misdiagnosed, but still I might have been on the spectrum before the changes got made.
Yeah, it is unpopular to discuss mental health or politics on the Internet. Rather than ban the people attacking the mentally ill person, they find it easier to just fire the mentally ill person from work or ban and censor them on the Internet etc.
I'd like to do some sort of non-profit that helps mentally ill people find work or start up their own businesses.
I’ve also stopped eating fast/oven food and started properly preparing my meals. I know very little about cooking so it’s a good learning experience (Youtube is really helpful) and I’m probably eating healthier as a result.
Another thing, about a year ago I stopped using Facebook, and I rarely use Twitter, and never use Instagram. I’m convinced they are the psychological equivalent of junk food.
Prepared foods are proven to be as bad for us as smoking but it’s not well publicized by the mainstream media.
Definitely! It's just so damn relaxing.
In addition to Facebook, I stopped consuming refined sugar/corn syrup, refined flour and coffee.
My cognitive resources are clearly increased. Now I need to stop HN, Reddit and Twitter ;)
Then there is this:
I heard that Apple is modifying their iOS and MacOS for parents to block access to websites and apps for their children, and it could help for us adults to stay productive during certain hours.
I have to admit I've become addicted to the Internet since 1995, but I always read job-related sites like HN that discuss technology, etc. Sometimes you have to get a discussion going on to help yourself get unstuck from writer's block or help others as well.
Continuing my refusal to have email/slack/$other on my phone.
Telling people that if they want impossible target a, then they need to let go of target b, and then walking off to let them figure shit out.
Deleting people who are unable to tweet politics objectivly/first hand (ie anything other than non specialist journalists)
Sadly it's a bit more difficult as a product manager. Simply being around for anything that comes up is very valuable in that position. I might need to plan the jump to consultancy some day.
So someone having issues on the system is frankly worth shit all compared to feeding/bathing/putting to bed my children.
I'm a sysadmin/sre/devop (delete as appropriate) so I do _occationally_ work out of hours. However I make it clear that I only expect to be called when there is a buisness level event (as in, if this doesn't get fixed we are going to go bankcrupt)
I am honest with my potential employer. I say I have to be back at my children's nursery by 18:00 of it'll cost one pound for every minute I'm late. Once I am home, I'm off the clock, and unless they are going to pay me _at least_ double time, I'm not ever working out of my contracted hours.
My rational is this:
In england, people have literally died for workers rights. I will not undermine other by "going above and beyond" The contract pays me for x hours, and thats what they get. Would a company expect a SaaS contract to offer 30% free funcionality? no, thats what contracts with SLAs are for. Why should employees be any different.
I have a similar role in London and having a hard time processing the situation. Employer confirmed that they won't pay for more than the contracted 35 hours a week, but I'm subtly expected to be available at any time and frequently work Saturday and/or Sunday when there's scheduled maintenance. I've had phone calls on weekends when the stuff I'm solely responsible for stops working. I'm not interested in time in lieu as weekends are the only time my wife has at home for us to spend time together. I also need the money,job is reasonably paid, so I can't just walk.
Being a PM I would say is harder to just do the contracted hours, as you are expected to always be there, just like the carpet.
Also you need to provide guidance to the rest of the team, who may choose to work late.
But, I have worked with very effective PMs who literally forced people home at the end of the day. Productivity (as measured) was not affected
In a small company there is also less possibility to delegate.
It wasn't a perfect move (the working holiday part), but damn it's by far the best winter I've had in a decade. 10/10 would flee again!
Currently writing from Bangalore, had to head central for good Internet and power, and a quiet desk, but that's a story for another time.
I'm curious, do you experience any loneliness? Presumably the internet facilitates communication with distant friends and family, but how about meeting people in meatspace?
Hit me up if you want a Bangalorean perspective on how to deal with the city.
I live in San Diego now and have been out of touch with the most recent developments, but I’m sure the city is still the same at heart.
These are the things that keep me in a decent mental shape after writing code all day. I also play highly-tiltable multiplayer games so that affects me also.
Cryptos and some stocks are also a source of stress. I also tend to avoid spending money on things I don't really need and then regret later, it's a discipline I learned while being a poor kid.
Praying and reading the Bible in the morning.
Biking to and from work.
Listening to music.
Visit the sick (there's a student club to play games with kids in the hospital), visit those in prison, feed the hungry (buy dinner for someone or invite & cook), welcome strangers into your home (CouchSurfing).
I attend the CouchSurfing meetup too, and church, but the social groups can bring stress sometimes, not only relieve it. Having several groups lets me vent the issues with one group to friends in another social circle.
Biking to work and going out for a run a few times per week also helps quite a bit. I think we're created for being out in nature.
I enjoy backing to work and back, but entitled drivers (park in bike lane, dangerous passes) make me really nervous and shoot my stress up instantly potentially negating the relaxing benefits. How do you handle that?
Spending time with a teacher (kindergarden teacher, no less!), helping out in the classroom from time to time, gives completely new perspectives.
Strangely enough you do not see an Ask HN: what are you doing for your T1 diabetes ? -- people will just see their doctor and inject insulin. Yet we do not treat mental health that way.
To be clear, I do agree that if you have serious issues it would be good to see a professional. But it's not a panacea and so it's quite possible, likely even, that a lot of people asking questions like OP are asking specifically because a professional has not been able to cleanly solve the problem, if at all. In fact, I've met plenty of people who felt they were worse off after getting help.
Again, I'd still recommend you try if you're struggling, but it's important to not see a mental health professional as 'the' solution, because on top of quite possibly turning out to be a disappointing experience, it might keep you from trying other stuff alongside it.
You're replying to a "Ask HN: What do you do to fix your mental health problems?", which is not the same thing. This thread is about prevention as much as it is about recovery.
Keeping things simple, hanging out with the 4-5 real friends I have rather than tracking 500 imaginary friends.
IRL I go to a lot of concerts, and I spend a significant amount of time cooking and baking, with my girlfriend.
IMO the key is to do stuff YOU like, instead of getting caught up in the drama of others.
Meditate in the morning (10mins) and in the evening (20mins).
Pretty much would advise everybody to go to a psychologist regulalry, it really helped me to stay sane (had episodes when I was genuinely affraid of going mad)
Quit drinking as well, which has had me beaming with a sense of accomplishment.
These two have had the secondary effect of falling asleep early and waking up well rested.
Cardio, roughly 60-90mins per day at high intensity, on average 4-5 days a week. I've noticed that a big mood boost happens after about an hour in -- endorphin release maybe.
I seriously doubt I would be as happy, or even alive, it I hadn't.
* Biking (or alternate rigorous exercise) every day
* Getting out of bed as soon as I'm awake
* Setting a bedtime and a bedtime plan (blue light filtering glasses two hours before bed; no tech an hour before)
* Reviewing positive and negative experiences to maximize positive ones and minimize negative ones"
* Setting measurable goals for improvement that make it clear what the most important thing to work on is
- Started learning a new language(along with my wife)
- Yoga classes and meditation
- Carpentry or home improvement projects
- Learning to keep things in their place and keep my room tidy
- Letting go at the end of a distraction filled day, but motivating(and performing) better on the next
- Reading inspiring words: The motivation manifesto by Brendon Burchard is my go to book.
- Make deliberate effort to do the opposite of what you Flight Response(System 1) wants.
- Having more friends over and playing some games with them.
- Not looking at political news.
- Trashing all junk food/unhealthy snacks in the house and replacing them with something better
Drink plenty of water (also helps with staying active--frequent bathroom breaks + the attendant socializing that comes with regularly wandering about the office :) )
Read and practice stoicism
Re-contextualize. When I feel myself in a rut, I force myself to do something new and uncomfortable. Keyword being "force" -- usually when in such ruts the last thing I want to be doing is putting myself somewhere unfamiliar. But this can help attenuate certain thinking patterns and/or give you new perspectives.
Oh yeah, and proper use of certain medications and therapies have also helped.
I have a wife and a dog whose I share my life with, we play games in the sofa and eat together, maybe once a year we travel to explore new places. Sometimes routine is hard, but I can always count on them snd vice-versa.
I take the bare minimum medication such that I don't get side affects and just about notice my cycling is over a reduced range.
I drink very little nowadays and as a rule stick to a particular niche beer style for a period and only drink beer I haven't already tried. Having managed several craft beer bars and worked with most local breweries it's rare a pub has something I don't know. I don't take drugs outside of prescriptions and haven't for a few years.
I have one coffee a day, first thing, and again stick to a particular origin for a long period so I don't find myself grabbing a starbucks for the sake of it. I go to bed at a sensible time and never let myself lie in.
I don't eat much sugar, or carbohydrates generally. I don't eat beef or lamb either. I try and include something like spinach or kale into every meal. I don't eat takeaway food very often any more, last year it was twice.
I try and get outside for an extended period each day. I sit down as little as possible. We have one television and it mainly stays off apart from the odd bit of kids TV or Formula 1.
When I don't feel like doing something I need to, I try and challenge that and prove to myself I can do it and that my fears were unfounded. If I'm worrying about something I ask myself what am I really afraid of and then I can reassure myself that if that situation occurred I could handle it.
I volunteer a day a week helping young people with mental health problems challenge themselves.
I keep extensive notes on ideas I have, things I need to do, etc, so that I'm not trying to remember things needlessly. My wife and I have strictly delegated tasks like monthly budgeting, meal planning. If I'm struggling with something I know to communicate that.
When I need to take a break mentally I'll put on an album I'm familiar with and play along with it or write down some recipe ideas or similar. My garage is where I can go to be alone when I need that.
Probably there's a hundred more things that aren't springing to mind right now
Practising mindfulness (I find it makes a big difference for me).
Spending time with friends and family.
My experiences have been mostly positive though not very rewarding because when it comes to OSS people just think of your work as something they're "buying" for free, i can't put it in words but it's like.. so this exists without giving much thought to hours of effort someone has put into it, i.e very few people think about the author because their focus is mainly on the software. It's understandable because I may have done it too.
For me personally i like starting projects a lot and very bad at maintaining them, dread looking at the issues in github. Also for me personally, finding contributers has been difficult so I maintain it for a while then move on to something else. I'm sure like everything a lot of people have a lot of different experiences, mostly depending on the popularity of the project and the people it affects (e.g.systemd type of stuff)
Behavioral psychotherapy (lucky enough to live in a culture with socialized health care)
Less social media, more in-person interaction
But actually, sometimes. I am really not online much ever, I spend enough time in front of screens so I sign off, all the way. Don't even bring my phone 9 out of 10 times.
After a 10-year hiatus, I rediscovered that IRC/Discord is still where it's at - and for some communities Slack (with its own set of problems).
When I am unable to have facetime, another mind online can anchor me offline.
But yeah. Talking, chatting, reading, and running. Marathon video game binges with old friends because we have less and less in common now. Everything helps.
What do you mean, "almost"? The client-to-server API runs entirely over HTTPS port 443. The server-to-server API is also HTTPS, but on a different port, but that's not a concern for the client.
Source: I'm running a small Synapse instance.