You mean you think there's another way?
To say it in less poetic English than OP; I just don't do them (well, a bit, but could've just as well not've done them) in the end. But do stress about them first.
This is also how I approach the relationship with my life-in partner.
With enough caffeine, and the bare minimum of sleep, I believe we can, collectively, run the planet like this till the wheels fall off. Or, at least, that does seem to be human's modus operandi.
Her strategy is to break all tasks into little manageable chunks and complete them over a period of weeks. My strategy is to sort all tasks into a giant priority queue and then complete each task in one non-stop session as late as possible but early enough that is still gets done. For those who are deadline-averse, my strategy is clearly anxiety inducing, so Trello allows to us pick dates for each other that we would like tasks to be completed by. So far, this has eliminated all difficulties and confusion involved in getting stuff done.
The next step is establishing a shared calendar so we can track events, but I haven't found one I like yet.
We started using Asana so that we could stop having nervous breakdowns every week. It worked. Now we use it for stuff like coordinating anything that doesn't fit on a notecard. Shopping lists generally are just on a kitchen whiteboard and you take a pic before you leave.
Any details on how granular those tasks become? Mostly talking about recurring ones.
1. You need to get all "open loops"—anything you think you need to do or want to do—out of your head and written down. You naturally get rid of these whenever you find yourself mulling over them and distracting from your main task.
2. They should be put in a trusted system that is both complete and has no duplication. Usually this should be separated by context (things to do at work, at home, etc). You should have just this one system, and not jump around between several ad hoc systems (an email inbox here, a list on the fridge there).
3. Each item needs a defined next physical action. So you can't just have something like "plan vacation." You need that to have an attached next action, such as "google hotels in Miami and make a list of options." And then when that's done you replace it with the next physical action and so on, until "plan vacation" is done.
I combine this with a homespun version of pomodoro (where I both work on tasks in 25 minute chunks and block my internet access with apps like Freedom and Stayfocusd for that amount of time). I also review my lists during break periods to get confident I'm doing the right thing. In just a few months I've cleared out a lot of my backlog and removed a lot of the background anxiety that had been plaguing my free time.
Truth is, I'm cycling between to-do list productivity tools every few months. OmniFocus could do anything you want, but can get quite complicated too. Things and Todoist are simple and straightforward, but are missing some essential (advanced) things. I can't seem to find the tool with that right sweet spot. I guess I love procrastinating with fiddling for the best tool configuration.
That said, I also often fallback to using pen&paper, and writing in the morning the 5 things that really should be completed today, and that seems to work very well too.
Does it get much interest from others, or are you the main user?
But seriously: I routinize. Saturday is cleaning day, every four days I go get groceries(our fridge is rather small).
For example, I have annually recurring tasks in Todoist to get Father's/Mother's Day gifts two weeks before the actual days and then separate tasks to call my parents on the actual days.
While it has been very effective for me, it might be leading to a Google-like effect  where my memory seems to be getting worse because I know I have a crutch.
I am also trying to maintain a daily routine (to make sure I do important things like exercise) and to finish unpleasant tasks in the morning before all the fun stuff.
I can't find it right now, the Google results show alot of well-ranked SEO-optimised sites instead about Alzheimer.
So the first thing I do is I put reminders where I see them. For instance there's a contract for a telephone provider I need to quit. The box connected to the provider is laying right there next to the computer I'm typing this on. This way it gets into my head and if I don't have higher priority tasks I will think about it regularly, without ever actually pushing myself to it.
Then instead of already resolving the issue (which in itself would cost energy) I procrastinate by planning or doing simple steps toward the goal. In this case it may be checking out on the website of the company how their quitting process works. After that I feel like I achieved something and successfully avoided doing actual work at the same time. That's the best reward for doing part of the job, feeling like you cheated your boss (in this case your inner moral guard).
And when there's really not anything left it most often means that the last step really isn't any effort anymore. So when I have everything prepared I just need to write a short text, and send it to the company, and be done with it. Because everything was planned out and prepped already.
Last but not least, if I really can't convince myself to even do a small step like googling the website of the company, then it probably means I'm too exhausted and instead of doing any serious tasks I really should take a walk and a nap, which I then also have motivation for since it also avoids doing the painful highest prio task.
Yeah, it's a slow process, but it actually hacks your brain into doing real work while it thinks it's procastinating, instead of the other way around.
The way I get tasks done is by doing them immediately I see that they need doing. If you can develop that habit then tasks won't even need managing, you won't need to set time aside to do things, and you'll always be on top of things. Sometimes it's really hard work to keep at it but your future self will thank you.
Don't assume that the way something is for you is the way it is for everyone. People's brains work very differently.
For things that have a clear deadline - calendar entries blocking time to go work on whatever it is (i.e. "Research deals for fall vacation").
I've found that writing things into either of those categories clarifies things a bit. Personal tasks end up being in the "I owe" lists, with my own name next to them.
+1 for daily meditation (and task list reflection)
Omnifocus: I throw everything that comes to mind to the inbox, whenever it occurs to me. Usually on weekends or whenever I panic about feeling things are spinning out of control, I'll go through and organize it, grouping things and adding dates. In the morning while waking up, I browse a bit, deciding what needs to happen.
Two things that work well for me about it:
- the geolocation context stuff is a godsend for remembering random things I need to pick up.
- The fact that uncompleted tasks don't automatically roll forward means I don't constantly have 647 overdue items, and makes me think about what I'm actually, really going to get done.
Notebook: Paper still works best for me for a lot of things. I still make lists there, sketch box diagrams when thinking through things, sketch ideas for stuff to make, collect random info, things that amuse me, etc. Also, it serves as a binder for loose paper/receipts/etc that are still in-flight. I trained myself to write the date and location on every page, and to write out sufficient context for even throwaway notes to actually remember what a given thing is later. This makes them very useful after they're full - I have years of full notebooks on my shelf and reference them more than you might think.
Some not-strictly-related things that reduce the cognitive load of existence for me:
- Once I got to a financial place where I could, I forced myself to start paying every bill the minute it came in. Not having to mentally keep track of due dates and all of that leaves room for worrying about a bunch of other stuff. Nobody gets auto-withdrawl permission, but doing things this way offers the same effect and is trivially easy now that everything is online.
- I scan any paper artifact that doesn't need to be paper. Organizing it is still tedious, but the payoff of actually being able to find something when I need it seems magic. Things tend to build up until I spend a couple hours on it, and then in to the shredder they go. Make sure your backup regimen is solid.
- A little, slightly hokey thing that nonetheless is useful for me: I started writing my (nonwork) goals on a whiteboard in my home office. Just whatever is important right now. Having it physically on the wall seems to provide a little bit of focus, something I frequently need.
I personally just use evernote and list everything there.
So I use Trello (most tasks, projects) integrated with Calendar (appointments, due dates) and Google Sheets (all payments, due dates).
Currently using pocket informant, I'm sure there's others too.