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A basic question comes up: Do you know what you want? Your goal is described in terms of acting the way you thought you were supposed to - finding some woman and starting a nuclear family with her. You're unhappy about not having that but you also say you're unmotivated.

What you may need is to shake everything up. If you aren't happy performing in this way(and following a traditional career and marriage script is a performance) start questioning who/what you are instead. There are a lot of different lifestyles out there. Some folks are libertine, others celebate. Gender and gender roles aren't static. You may desire a subset of sex, romance, or children, but not all three. If you go through the process of exploring and questioning and come out the other side basically still aligned with the norms, you'll be more prepared for a relationship - you'll understand just how different people can be. Goes the same for your career choices too - you may do better with a small tweak. Imagine interviewing for different positions and conpanies.




What you may need is to shake everything up. If you aren't happy performing in this way(and following a traditional career and marriage script is a performance) start questioning who/what you are instead. There are a lot of different lifestyles out there.

Well said. We have to be very careful to not let other people, ancient rituals, and social stereotypes define who we are - of who we feel like we need to be (or become).

It's your life. When you die, we all cease to exist.




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